April 17th, 2006

Unhappy

::Accidental f-lock instead of Private::

Anymore of this, anymore of Seto saying this "I can't be with you anymore." and the like, anymore of him saying I'm a failure at life, anymore of being called a failure in general, anymore of the 'concubine' begging for sex, anymore of the sick feeling chest pain headaches, and I am going to start

a) screaming
b) screaming specifically at Seto
c) crying
d) killing
e) throwing up
or
f) throwing things

and I won't stop for as long as I can keep it up.

If he ends it all again, I'm going to Egypt and I am staying there for the rest of this life, then I'm going to hope and pray that they don't send me back again. I won't let them. I can't take him doing that again. I couldn't take coming back to a life that doesn't have him in it either, which makes escaping him if he does it again pointless, really, and

But that's just loving him, isn't it?

Nothing can ever be fucking normal for me.
  • Current Mood
    pissed off pissed off